A Pair o’ What?

“Yes, they are!” the lissome, young woman declared, annoyed at her friend for contradicting her.  “They’re a pair o’ Docs!”  Indeed, the shiny-new, black Doc Martens that graced her small feet proved the truth of her words.  “You’re as stubborn as an ox!”

“No way!” the preppy, young man strolling beside her insisted, pointing to the tan, Dockers boat-shoes he was sporting.  “These are a pair o’ Docks!  You’re like a child who can’t admit she’s wrong!” 

Walking with them through the mall, wearing my raggedy, old sneakers, I could readily understand the reason they persisted in their respective points of view.  Both of them, in their own way, were right about their claims, but neither took the time to explore that.  The true paradox lay in their inability to move beyond the statements they were making to ask each other why they were making them.

Rather than denying her assertion so vehemently in the first place, the young man might have asked, “What makes you think those are Docks?”

“Because that’s what everybody calls their Doc Marten boots,” she might have replied.  “They’re Docs for short.”

“Ahh,” the lad might have said.  “Docs!  With no K.”

Or perhaps, instead of becoming annoyed with her companion, the young woman might have said, “Those aren’t even high-tops you have on!  How can you call them Docs?”

To which the young man might have answered, “They’re Dockers!  Docks, for short.”

It seems to me we do that all too often these days—jump to judgment, rush to defend, hasten to attack.  Rational discourse disappears like morning’s mist in the warm sunlight, replaced by angry diatribes as raw as spoiled sushi.

Why we do that is a conundrum, for sure—an illogicality, an absurdity.  Why we frequently fail to listen first to others’ viewpoints before proclaiming our own is a puzzler.  To excerpt a statement from Churchill, our propensity to jump so quickly to argument is ‘a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma’—in short, a paradox.  Attentive listening and cogent communication are surely the better alternatives.

I have long been of the opinion that certainty is the enemy of an open mind, that we should not allow ourselves to believe everything we think.  But therein lies a paradox, too.  What if I’m wrong?

Nevertheless, I proceeded to intervene with my walking companions, hoping to resolve the difference of opinion.  “You’re both right, y’know.  One of you is wearing Doc Martens, the other is wearing Dockers.  And both of them can be called Docs or Docks, depending on the spelling.”

They looked at each others’ shoes for a moment, frowning slightly, then the young woman said, “Okay, but mine are the real Docs!  Yours are like something Gatsby would wear!” 

“Wrong again!” the young man replied.  “Mine are the only true Docks!  Yours are like Goth galoshes!”

I left them at that point, exasperated by their smugness, their obtuseness.  And anyway, badly in need of new footwear, I had my own shopping to do.  I’d done my research and knew exactly what I wanted.

A pair o’ Crocs.

_{© J. Bradley Burt 2023}