To Be Honest

See you later, hon.  I’m meeting Bob.  We’re going to leave from his house. 

You’re going with Bob Fictitious again? 

Yes, we’ll be back in a couple of hours. 

Bob, did you contribute already?

Yes, I sure did.  I gave enough money so they posted my name on the board of contributors.  Do you see my name up there? Near the top.  Big bold letters under the “Aces” column, “Bob Fictitious”.  Seeing that there makes me feel good about myself. 

You feel good, that’s great Bob, but, the charity is what’s really important, right? 

Not totally.  If I’m going to give my hard-earned money to those poor souls, then someone should be giving me a pat on the back.  If no one else does, I might as well do it myself.  To be honest, it doesn’t hurt if a few of my clients see my name up on the board.  I can afford to help others.  I’ve done pretty well for myself.  I’m a little smarter than most.  I’ve worked hard, and I’ve done a lot with what I’ve been given.  Compared to those poor souls looking for a handout, I’m,… well what’s the word I’m searching for.  Well,… better, I guess. 

Bob, I have to say that is a very succinct assessment. You must have turned your money into Mary.  I heard her thank you for the contribution. 

Yes, I did.  Pretty clever, yuh.  I’ve been trying to score some points with her for a long time.  Had my eye on her even before my divorce. 

You’re divorced, Bob.  I would have never guessed. 

Well, it’s been a couple of months, so I think it’s time to get back in the game.  You know, dating.  You haven’t forgotten about that have you.  Or maybe you never knew much about it.  It’s not easy to find the right person.  They have to appreciate the real me.  Because, I tell it like it is.  They have to value honest opinions.   Appreciate a person who is really honest. 

But Bob, there’s a difference between honest and brutally honest. 

I’m not sure I know what you mean. 

I rest my case.  By the way, I do know your second wife, Robin.  I also knew Debbie, the first one.

Hi dear, I’m back. 

Did you have fun?  Did they raise a lot of money?  I just don’t know why you go with Bob, I thought you didn’t care for him that much.

Yes, on the fun and we did raise a lot of money.  As far as Bob is concerned, I think it does me some good to spend time with him.  To be honest, I sometimes see a little of myself in him.