Be Careful!

Marvin stared for several seconds wondering how this was possible. How could an 80 ton piece of metal float along in the sky? It made no sense. He was glad he never dared to venture into the sky. Safety was his passion and he was very good at it and so was his wife

Marvin looked into Maureen’s eyes as they walked hand in hand on the small boardwalk through the seagrass and palms of their gated community’s beautiful seaside preserve. They nodded slightly in recognition that they were thinking the same thoughts. 46 years of marriage does that to you. 

Like minded, they would never buy a new model of a car- let someone else discover the mistakes. They parked at least 100 feet from any other vehicle- you don’t want someone to slam their door open into your car. They always picked a table in a restaurant near the emergency exit- there are a shocking number of kitchen fires. 

Their life was a safe set of routines too- up at 6:00, vitamins and supplements after a cup of cottage cheese with 5 strawberries cut exactly in half, exactly 16 minutes of stretching exercises, and a thorough cleaning of all counters with disinfectant. Then they would proceed with their morning walk of exactly 3.6 miles on the preserve boardwalk in their retirement community. 

Of course, there was no smoking, no drinking, no R rated movies, and no Ben and Jerry’s Chunky Monkey ice cream. They checked their blood pressure and heart rate three times a day and kept a record of these figures in a journal. The couple was quite proud of the fact that they were able to avoid all accidents, illnesses and diseases that plague others. They did not know that their safe and secure life was about to be permanently and grievously altered. 

Marvin stared up again at the jet plane that seemed to be turning to the left and descending at a rapid rate. Marvin and Maureen stopped to watch as the plane looped and fell slowly even though this break in their pace would extend their walking time by 2.5 minutes by Marvin’s calculation. 

It was the first crash of a commercial jet plane in four years, according to the CNN reporter at the scene. Behind him the smoldering wreckage was scattered about the preserve. The reporter stated that all 247 people on board were killed instantly. They were unsure about victims on or near the boardwalk at this time “but residents of the complex stated that Marvin and Maureen were always in that spot at the exact time of the crash”. 

The lawyer read the will slowly. He began- “Being of sound and cautious mind, Marvin and Maureen created this 176 page document outlining the actions to be taken in the event of a wide range of catastrophes. On page 232, section 68.2b they state that in the event of a plane falling from the sky killing them, all proceeds of their estate will be donated in equal portions to their three children with one provision. They will not henceforth travel in any vehicle which leaves the ground. Failure to follow this provision will result in their portion of the inheritance to be donated to the WHA, the Walk for Health Association”. 

The attorney returned the microphone to the wall holder. The children and their families, assembled in a jet plane, parked at the airport hanger, unbuckled their seat belts and walked slowly to the emergency exit sign as instructed in the will’s final directive.