Watson Investigations, Inc.

Watson picked up the paper. As he let his body fall the final 20 centimeters into his overstuffed chair, he sighed. Reaching for his tea on the side table he smiled. Watson enjoyed his third reading of the story.

The deadline on the front page read “Doctor Watson Solves Another Murder”. The article began, “Dr. Watson, formerly assistant to the great Sherlock Holmes brought yet another murderer to justice yesterday. After the arrest, he told this reporter, ‘It was elementary. The critical clues included a half smoked cigarette, a small coffee spill and a bookmark placed in a magazine on the victim’s desk’.”

In the next few paragraphs the story went on linking these clues to the perpetrator now in custody. Watson felt a slight sense of guilt. Afterall, he did kill Sherlock a month or so ago in a perfect double murder. First, Watson had to kill his gay lover who mocked his interests and plans until it could be tolerated no longer. Then he decided he may as well get rid of Sherlock for the same reasons. No more second fiddle for this sidekick.

Watson finished his leisurely breakfast of tea and biscuits noting that would not have happened a few weeks earlier. Holmes would rush in after the early morning call from the police and drag him along to the fresh crime scene. Watson wondered, “What was all that rush for. The body isn’t going anywhere”.

At the crime scene, Watson walked into the study and observed the body lying on an oriental rug. It looked a bit familiar. Stab wounds in the back. Then, he spotted a broken pair of glasses next to the head, staring back at the body. He walked briskly over to the wastebasket and withdrew a travel brochure to a couples resort. A chill ran up his spine. He whirled around to find the corpse standing before him. Sherlock greeted Watson as he peeled away his fake beard. “Sorry about the crime scene, I thought you might like a trip down memory lane.”

Watson stammered, “But, but you’re dead!”. Holmes chuckled, “Apparently my death has been greatly exaggerated”. He explained. “The big tip off was your failure to alert me to be cautious climbing down the trap door ladder into the dark basement with only a small pen light. That was totally out of character. Of course, I had long since deduced that you were gay. You did seem to linger over the couples resort brochure that was in the wastebasket, which aroused some interest on my part”.

Holmes went on to fill out the story. He had waited for Watson to depart the crime scene. Then he climbed back into the room. He notified the Police who brought proper equipment to investigate the ladder and basement. “The broken rung half way down the ladder was fine. But the poisoned tipped stakes at the bottom were perfect. Very well done, Watson”.

Watson protested, “But what about the Police report and the news story?”. Taking a few puffs for dramatic effect Holmes stated, “I decided I am likely to be more effective dead than alive. From now on, you are my eyes and ears”. He related how he had reached an understanding with the Police. Watson would never be arrested for attempted murder. And as for the actual murder, “It will remain unsolved”.

Watson sat motionless in the desk chair and mumbled softly, “Now what?” Holmes walked up to Watson patting Watson’s shoulder, “You have shown you have ambition and a creative criminal mind- the final ingredients you need to rise to the highest detective ranks”.  He went on “We will make an unbeatable team under Watson Investigations Inc. And of course, you will go on with your publishing”.

Watson leaned forward a bit and spoke with a stronger voice, “I guess you have proven your point Holmes. Anyone can commit a crime with the proper motivation”. Sherlock smiled, “You’re learning”.