His left-hand griped the steering wheel. His right-hand chocked the leather gearshift knob. Tense body ached with excitement, now steering a course for the final adobe of the righteous. His being was consumed with shahid, giving himself to Allah.
He drank the Turkish tea, flavored with drops of narcotics, more to heighten his awareness than promote courage. It was now time. Dilated eyes, macabre stare, sense of purpose as Ismail Ascari accelerated the yellow Mercedes-Benz truck into the basement parking garage.
6:22 in the morning, he detonated ten tons of TNT; building collapsed. 220 sleeping Marines would not awake.
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That middle paragraph is especially powerful and essentially tells the whole story…very tight description! The Mercedes-Benz thing is interesting. Since reading this, I have read two more examples of bombs in Mercedes…there’s something there….
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Excellent and concise plot, setting, language, description, characterization. Well done!
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Frightening real! Fantastic you could squeeze little details in to create tension, as well as visualization! Good job!
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Great tension, reminds me of the show “24”, tick, tick.
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Ww – right out of past news. Nicely crafted…
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Wow! Suspense usually takes a while to build to climax, but you squeezed it all in with just a few sentences. Nice work!
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thx. The prompt kept it to 100 words keeping me from my usual “overwriting” compulsion.
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I usually post on Thursday after a few rewrites. But keeping with this week prompt (48 hours no rewrite) I posted this today.
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