Welcome to No-Day

I’m having trouble knowing what day it is. I know it’s a sign of dementia but I’m pretty coherent otherwise. My language skills, the highest level of mental activity, seem OK- as I am writing this.

The Corona (AKA Co-bid 19) lockdown may be the culprit. Being semi-retired with out any regularly scheduled activities lately and with minimal contact with the outside world I’m left “day-less”. In what seems like the distant past I knew it was Sunday because it was church day. It was Monday because it was duplicate bridge day. Tuesday was chess club day- and so on.

Without any of these markers I’m left floating in a timeless void. I’m left to watch the death count rise worldwide, country wide, state wide, city wide, community wide and probably soon block wide.

Thank goodness for my smart phone. I know it’s Wednesday April 1^st and it’s 9:36 AM EST. Somehow that’s comforting. Yes, I can always connect to the world by watching 24-7 news on my smart phone. But that’s not much help. I have to wash my hands every time I pick it up. Perhaps the virus can be picked up electronically. My smart phone tends to turn itself on at times without my prompting to offer a sale or sing a song.  Perhaps it’s lonely and needs my attention. If it’s that needy it might just invite Corona over for a drink.

I have decided that since every day is the same, we should have a new day called “No-Day”. It’s easy to remember and it requires no thought. If someone asks “What day is it?” You will always be right if you say “No-Day”. Having a label always makes things tolerable. “No-Day” gives us a false sense of control, I know, but it is oddly comforting. Try it. Before I apply for a copyright on “No-Day” I will have to do some research on whether this has already been used.

OK, I’m back. It is now Wednesday, April 1^st at 10:46 AM. I have completed my research and I sadly have to report that “No-Day” in concept, if not the actual words, has been used for centuries. Even today, probably half the world’s population lives on “No-Day” time. These folks have no job, no clubs, no fitness classes, no school and no smart phone.  They live in squalor and struggle to exist each day. No wonder they eat rats and bats which leads to animal-human cross-over viruses.

I will continue to use “No-Day” until this tragic pandemic concludes. I will soon return to my regular schedule of clubs and activities. My 401K will return to its previous high in about 8 years if history repeats itself. However, I fear that Cobid-20 is already brewing in some corner of that other world. I’m afraid our Big Beautiful Wall, our airport passenger temperature checks, and our immigrant blockade will not be enough. The only safe play might be to care about each other and to care about our planet. I’ll check on that but I’m pretty sure that we have a new idea here.