Thor Invents Philosophy

Thanks to the Thor Empire mankind was no longer living in eternal fear of starvation. Thor and More was serving up barbecued deer to the hungry masses. People now were freed from endless hunting and foraging. With time on their hands primitive people now had the luxury of contemplating the meaning of life.

 

Seeing a new opportunity Thor opened the Why and How Come School of Thought. He personally sat around under the trees with his students- hands raised in supplication (and due also to a strange muscle spasm if truth be told).

 

Early man looked to nature to solve the Mystery of Life. Out of this searching several creation philosophies emerged. The first was that man was born in the image of the mushroom. Mushrooms preferred caves and had a variety of strange looking tops, like man.

 

A competing philosophy speculated man was much more powerful than the mushrooms. In fact, man was presumed to be the most powerful creation on the planet. However, after a few dozen citizens were killed by the bite of some tiny insect, it was hard to believe man was the King of the World.

 

Lively debates continued at The School. Caterpillars, acorns and spiders all were contemplated as the true source of knowledge and inspiration. Looking to the sky the Sun seemed a likely candidate too for such high honors. However the Sun did need to rest each day. And one day, for a few minutes a black hood seemed to be placed over it. This suggested a less prominent position should be given to the Sun.

 

This covering of the Sun incident led to the concept of Good vs. Evil but no clear line of thinking emerged from this debate. So Thor left the great search for the meaning of life to later generations. Thor did profit nicely from his tuition charges and extra fees for labs, tutors and incidental supplies such as frogs, newts and adult beverages.

 

Many since have attempted to answer the Final Question, without success though Douglas Adams did recently offer one answer in his famous four part trilogy. In Hitchhikers’ Guide to the Galaxy he concluded that the true answer to the meaning of life was “42”. Coincidentally the Yankee relief pitcher Mariano Rivera was assigned this number several thousand years after the School began the search for knowledge. Although no one could hit his split finger fast ball, it is doubtful that the split finger fast ball is the key to the Mystery of Life, but who knows?

 

Douglas Adams died at an early age right after completing the trilogy so perhaps he came too close to the truth. Steven Hawking has been silent on this “42” matter which makes you wonder. Of course, nobody understood the meaning of the “42” answer so that wasn’t much help. The mystery remains. Philosophers continue the search today with a much higher tuition and no adult beverages.