The Story of Thor

 

He was the odd one. While everyone was throwing rocks at the giant deer, he watched as the rocks rolled by when they missed the target. While everyone was tearing at the flesh and eating chunks of the deer, Thor was collecting the rocks for his experiments.

 

In the process of watching the rocks roll, Thor noticed that the rocks knocked down small branches and twigs in their path. He found it amusing and challenging to set up several pieces of wood and knock them down with his rocks. This early form of bowling soon caught on and various tribes began to compete for prizes, such as deer meat.

 

The crowds sometimes got rowdy at these contests and the bowling rocks were occasionally thrown at one another. This resulted in league rules which are still followed today. It is illegal to throw bowling balls at competitors in most states. However, Thor was quite observant. He later used the rocks as missiles inventing the first artillery.

 

Thor was always on the move which annoyed others. While others rested and slept after the hunt, he wandered about watching, touching, throwing, tasting and examining things.

 

One day, while rubbing and smashing the rocks together to make them more round and smooth he observed a few sparks fly into the air. Frightened, he reached down and threw a handful of dirt at the sparks that lay glowing on the ground. He didn’t know it at the time but he had invented the first fire extinguisher. Of course, fire had not yet been invented so it wasn’t a very useful discovery.

 

A few weeks later while he was working on his bowling rocks, Thor noticed a bird fly by the cave entrance. He immediately ran off for a few hours, jumping and flapping his arms. In spite of his effort and a few minor injuries he was unable to fly. Unfortunately due to his quick departure from the cave he failed to notice that a few sparks had flown into the air and landed on a pile of twigs that constituted his mattress. The smoldering pile of twigs eventually erupted into flames. All that was left when Thor returned was a pile of ashes and a blackened deer that was drying on a wood rack next to the former mattress. In one bold stroke Thor had discovered fire and barbecue. He soon had a chain of fast food joints he called “Thor and More”.

 

Celebrating his inventions, some cavemen created crude drawings on the cave wall to commemorate Thor’s work. The recent discovery of these drawing has led to Thor being elevated to his rightful place- the first inventor and the first human with ADD.