Eat your vegetables…It’ll put hair on your chest

Alexander, a British missionary, boarded a small tugboat from the main island of Gran Carinaria to one of the very small rural tributaries in the Canary Islands.  As he approached the Isle de Verdura (the island of vegetables) his excitement was only exceeded by his fear.

In his first assignment, he was tasked with bringing some Christian education to the people of this small island.  He was eager to meet these reclusive people and learn about their culture.  No missionary had ever ventured to this small island.  The only thing he knew was they were supposedly farmers and were founded by a group of Moroccan tribes long ago.  They went through Spanish rule, so some spoke Spanish and some spoke French or Arabic, from their Moroccan roots.

Alexander sat silent on the short journey, when the captain said “Alli esta la isla.”  There they saw the island for the first time.  It looked like in a movie, Alexander thought, a tropical island of trees and green foliage beyond a mist.

He thanked the captain and jumped onto the beach with only a backpack and Alexander had a trunk with bibles in Spanish, French and Arabic, the languages he was told the natives may speak.

As he walked through the tropical forests to the village, he marveled at the sizes of the huge fruits on the trees.  The villagers were staring at him, as very few outsiders ever came to the island.  The natives were neither savages nor typical villagers.  They dressed with very little due to the dense humidity, but spoke like gentleman.  Alexander was relieved, as they seemed quite civilized.  That would make his job easier.

He quickly found the abode of the village elder, Manueldor.  He warmly invited Alexander in and started him on a tour of the island.

Alexander was amazed at the lush and green landscape with bountiful farms bursting with large vegetables.  The more he saw, the more unusual the size of the crops seemed.

The guide spoke Spanish, so Alexander understood most of what he said.  He explained that fruits and vegetables were the only crop of the island and every bit stayed on the island.   None ever left.  The villagers didn’t want outsiders.  And no one ever left the island.

When they returned, they enjoyed a big feast and village gathering.  Since everyone on the island were vegetarians, the enormous fruits and vegetables were displayed in the most wonderful and delicious dishes.

Alexander enjoyed the meal and the pageantry the people welcomed them with.  As he clapped and laughed at the songs and dances, he began to notice something unusual.  He looked again and again, but came up the same every time.  All the men had long flowing hair like Sampson and bushy long beards.  Even the older men had luxurious manes.  And the women had tresses falling all the way down to their knees.  Everyone had legs and arms with nests of hair.  Puzzled, Alexander took off his hat and rubbed his prematurely receding hairline.   How in the world can they all have such wonderful locks of hair, he wondered?

The next day he asked Manueldor about his discovery.  He said it was a magical combination of the volcanic base of the island and the tropical trade winds that have given the island such hardy yields.  They never had a bad harvest in 200 years.  And the island had the same effect on the people.  Free and out in the air where hair follicles grew, they lived long and healthy lives and all the hair on their bodies was as plentiful as their crop.  The elder said he should know, as he was 200 years old.

Alexander smiled.  So if I eat these vegetables and live on this island, I will grow hair? He asked as he removed his hat.  Manueldor laughed and handed him a big plate of vegetables.  Alexander took a big bite.  “Sounds like everyone here reaped what they sowed,” he laughed.