OBSESSION

OBSESSION

As an infant, I loved being ROCKed in my cradle. Hearing my mother sing “ROCK -A – Bye, Baby”. The Pet ROCK craze dominated my mind. I kept mine in a secret place, all warm and cozy, in my closet. I saved a ROCK from everywhere I traveled, whether a friend’s house or a foreign land.

Slowly, ROCKs accumulated to the point it was necessary to plant a ROCK garden, with the only plant ROCK weed.

My obsession led me to study geology in college. I became quite famous in my field and was given the honor of analyzing the first ROCK brought back from the moon!

The continued obsession with ROCKs followed me my entire life.

ROCK and Roll is my favorite music, followed by ROCK-A-Billy.

I continuously attended ROCK concerts. Elton John is my favorite performer as he sings “ROCKet Man”.

Sitting in a ROCKing chair is my favorite form of relaxation (“Old ROCKing Chair’s Got me”).

My favorite ice cream, you guessed it, ROCKy Road.

I joined a church just because they sang “ROCK of Ages” every Sunday.

Between a ROCK and a hard place is my favorite saying.

“ROCKy” is the best movie ever. ROCK Hudson, the best actor of all time.

ROCKy Marciano was the best boxer, ever.

The best holiday is St. Patrick’s Day as it features a shamROCK.

As a geologist, my interest is now in space (“Third ROCK from the Sun”), (retro ROCKets).

I could obviously go on boring you, but my obsession ended in tragedy. One day, while scaling the ROCKy Mountains (my favorite place), a massive ROCK slide came careening down the mountain, burying me under tons of ROCKs. I died instantly!

Thankfully, they sang “ROCK of Ages” at my funeral and entered my body in a ROCKy tomb on a ROCKy hillside.