IT COULD HAVE BEEN WORSE

IT COULD HAVE BEEN WORSE

 

There I was, caught in the vortex, hurling through space, uncontrolled!

Time seemed to disappear. There was no sensation of speed, when the power of the vortex would dissipate, where I’d end up, or if the vortex would cease operation.

You may ask, how did I get there? Well, I’ll tell you the whole story, you lucky devils!

I was casually strolling on Fort Myers beach, when a shaft of blinding light appeared on the horizon. It slowly approached and, without warning, sucked me up, ignoring everyone else on the beach! A small parrot fish, named Judy, was my only companion.

After what seemed like an eternity, Judy and I were dropped unceremoniously on what I thought was a deserted island somewhere in the South Pacific. I was disorientated and very scared until I spied a small village. Entering furtively, I could not believe my eyes! The village was inhabited by many beautiful, exotic women, dressed in sarongs, who ran to me, caressing and kissing my body – pushing me to the height of ecstasy!

I idled away many weeks in the village, pampered and fondled by these gorgeous, raven-haired beauties. Why so much attention? There were no other men on the island!

Eventually, a pirate ship from Somalia pulled into the island and, much to the dismay of the lovely females, took me captive! I spent many weeks being physically abused by the pirates.

 

 

The vessel finally made land in the capital, Mogadishu, where I was held captive in a cell – the floor covered with straw. I shared the cell with an Ethiopian soldier, named Gepaw from Addis Ababa, captured during a border dispute. We were allegedly being held for ransom.

We plotted our escape. One night our guard fell asleep. With the aid of a rope fashioned from the straw, we were able to get the guard’s keys and unlock our cell. We walked for many days until we reached Ethiopia.

From there, I was able to get a job as a steward on a tramp steamer, filled with illegal arms on their way to the civil war in Yemen.

Ashore in Sana’a, I located a kindly old lady who was able to get me on another steamer, filled with victims of a cholera epidemic on their way to England for treatment.

Once there, I made my way to the American embassy. After much negotiation (they never believed my story), I was escorted to a plane and flown back to the U.S., making my way to Fort Myers two years after my incredible, almost unbelievable adventure began.

But, it could have been worse!

What if the island was inhabited by men instead of those exotic women?

I never found out what happened to the Judy!