EDICT #1047

EDICT #1047

 

Whereas I am the Royal Potentate of Pelican, I proclaim this day, the Fourth of July, in the year two thousand and seventeen, as Dependence Day! Dependence on me!

 

It is the date when the royal issues of my harem of 22 wives and concubines accompany their royal progeny (165 at last count) to gather around me in the Palace Severino. Each, in turn, must declare dependence on me – hence the name Dependence Day.

 

My oldest son, Achmed Ali Ben Yusef Ben Materita, will be at the head of the line and be the first to declare his loyalty to me. His job, other than that, will be to place my progeny in order according to their date of birth. I shall then place royal hand on each of their heads as they pledge their undying loyalty to me.

 

My first wife, Fatima Melania, will then proceed to align the other wives and concubines according to the date of our first betrothal.

 

Following the blessings, there will be food, drink and dancing aplenty throughout Pelicania. Service will be rendered by my staff of 35 eunuchs, led by the oldest, Mahatma Mahatma Carena. This loyal servant has been with me since I ascended the Pelican throne.

 

After dinner, all will retreat to Dependence Hall for the reading of the Declaration of Dependence, followed by fireworks prepared by Jawahal Gucci – a fitting end to a day proclaiming my greatness and the only day I can get those darn kids together in the same room.

 

In the name of Krishna, I hereby proclaim this a recurring holiday on the same date in perpetuity.